I haven't been blogging lately because this semester, I've stupidly volunteered myself up for more responsibilities than I can actually handle. Note to self: NEVER DO THIS AGAIN, QRRATUGIYA!! So I'm sorry, blog. I still think about you all the time, though. Every night before I sleep, I tell myself to just write a paragraph of what it's been like the last month or so, but then I find myself hopping into bed and sleeping within minutes. Well, not at always, though, beeeeecuzzzz ... I think about all the things that need to get done the next day. And you know what's stupidly funny? I've so much to do I don't know where to begin so I end up sleeping more to avoid having to do them.
But last week, I discovered a trick: I have to stop thinking in numbers and just see each task as one individual separate task that has to be done. I did this with a couple of things this week, and I got them done surprisingly fast. So the change? Here:
Older me: OMG! I've to do things A, B, C, D, ... Z! omgomg omgomgomgg!!! ... okay, first things first, get some water. Okay, now go take a shower because, why not. ... done. Okay now let's drink some green/cinnamon/ginger tea... done. All right, time to do some work. ... OooOhh, bubble tea! Or baklava! Let's get some baklava, qrratu. Yeeeeahh! ... waste about an hour getting that baklava ... finally settled down to get to work now. Lets review all the things that need to get done. ... OMG! OMG OMG! Another panic attack. ... all right, calm down, qrratu, we can do this! We can do this! Let's do a little dance to warm up and energize ourselves and all. The dance lasts about an hour because, well, I have my reasons. Next thing I know, it's almost really late and I'm sleepy, so I'm like, all right, work, you'll get done tomorrow then becuz I'm tired now and need a fresh mind to finish you.
That's literally how the last couple of weeks have been. Just thinking about the work that needs to get done instead of actually doing it.
The newer me? Here: List of the things I need to get done with their deadlines, the earliest coming first. Okay, qrratu, let's erase this damned list and focus on one thing at a time. There we go: Thing One. Limit self to this much time to work on it. Don't think about the next thing that has to be done. Just focus on and complete Thing One. And VIOLA! Thing One gets done!! I sleep relaxed.
So yeah. More another time.